Back To School With Confidence: Tips For Reducing Your Child’s Anxiety

Farewell To Summer

          As the calendar has turned from August to September, the back-to-school ritual has begun for millions of schoolchildren nationwide. While many may feel a sense of regret that the warm summer days are beginning to dwindle and getting noticeably shorter, other students may experience a sense of anticipation and even excitement about the onset of the new school year.

Not all young people happily anticipate the start of school. Many may experience anger about having to give up the freedom of summer, anticipating having to engage in school routines and managing the workload.

However, a group of students has a different emotional experience anticipating the onset of school beginning.

          Recent data from the Child Mind Institute reveal that approximately 30% of children and adolescents are impacted by anxiety. Regrettably, 80% do not receive help. While it is difficult to pinpoint what percentage of students are triggered to experience anxiety by the onset of the school year, the uncertainty surrounding it can be a catalyst for feeling overwhelmed by anxiety.

How To Tell If Your Child Is Anxious About School Starting

          For preschoolers, being tearful before going to preschool or daycare, being excessively clingy to you, or witnessing a regression in previously mastered behaviors, such as having bathroom accidents even though toilet training has been mastered, can indicate fear of going to school if these occur around the time school begins.

          School-age children may flat-out resist going to school, act increasingly contrary, or begin to complain of somatic issues such as headaches or stomachaches, which can suggest stress reactions about going to school.

          School refusal can be prominent for teens, as seen in their wanting to retreat to their rooms and engage in solitary activities. Also, an increase in your teenager expressing irritation or being sullen or moody can all be indicators of anxiety about going to school

School Can Be A Trigger

          There are many reasons why the resumption of school in the Fall can be anxiety-provoking for students. These can include concerns over fitting in with peers, establishing their identity and independence, possible concerns over their academic performance, and trying to find a balance between what their parents, teachers, and even peers may expect from them.

          Also, the time between the end of summer vacation and the resumption of school is a transition, which can elicit stress and fear in many.

Prepare Early And Communicate With Your Child

          With the return of the school year upon us, here are some strategies for parents to consider to help make their child’s start to the school year as stress-free as possible.

          To help your child ease into the new school year, it is wise to address it before their return to school.

          For instance, start reintroducing a back-to-school routine about one to two weeks before starting school. Specifically, this would include introducing consistent bedtimes, wake-up times, and meal schedules. This can give your child plenty of time to adjust their routine and mentally prepare for the changes when school resumes.

          If possible, it can be a good idea to bring your child to their school before classes resume. Having an opportunity to walk around the building, find their classroom, and possibly meet their teacher can be very reassuring. This may be especially so for students transitioning to a new school building.

          Another idea is to arrange playdates with classmates or friends your child has not seen over the summer. Reconnecting with peers can help reduce social worries.

          Involve your child in preparing to go back to school. Specifically, have them pick out their school supplies, pack their schoolbag or backpack, and choose their first-day outfit. Having your child do these things can give them a sense of control and increase their confidence.

          Create a countdown calendar with your child. Having a visual countdown can help your child mentally prepare for the start of school. Take it further by taking off the days and discussing what they can look forward to each day.

          Parents need to remain calm and positive themselves. Kids are very aware of their parent’s emotions. Having control over your emotions regarding school resumption can help your child feel more secure. Parents must engage in self-care to help maintain their mental equilibrium.

          Teaching your child relaxation techniques such as deep breathing or visualization can help them control their anxiety as soon as they begin to experience it.

          If possible, try to get a class list. Knowing who will be in their class can help your child focus on the children they know, get along with, and strategize how to deal with kids they may have had issues with previously.

          If your child worries much about getting to know the other students in their class, you can practice conversing with other children. How to initiate a conversation can be particularly difficult for children with anxiety. Role-play this situation with your child, allowing them to practice greeting new and familiar faces while offering feedback and suggestions.

          If your child has an individual education plan (IEP), a Section 504 plan, or some other type of classroom support, ensure they understand how these work. For instance, let your child know if they can have more time on assignments or take a test in a location with minimal distractions or other accommodations. This can help them advocate for themselves if necessary.

          Make sure your child knows who his guidance counselor or other school mental health support is so they can seek them out if necessary.

          Maintain open communication with your child, allowing them to express their emotions about the new school year. Listen to what your child is saying, and do not dismiss it. Validate their feelings even if you disagree with them. It can be helpful to reassure them that it is not unusual to feel uncertain about the upcoming school year and that they are most likely not alone in their feelings.

          Most importantly, offering your child a space to talk is essential to have them feel they are being heard and that you are accepting of them.

A Final Word

          Adjusting to changes in our lifestyles can be very challenging. Acknowledging this to your child can help them feel their reactions are common and feel more confident they can overcome their trepidation. Indeed, how you support your child as they return to school can serve as a template for how they will manage other events that may make them anxious.

          View this situation as an opportunity to give your child the gift of confidence to face new challenges with a calm heart and open mind!

“You’re off to great places! Today is your day! Your mountain is waiting. So ... get on your way!” — Dr. Seuss, “Oh, the Places You’ll Go!”